No Words for His Words

This story from the Niagra Gazette (via Fark.com) is insane and hysterical. This is my favorite part:

"When they asked if he was alone in the car, he allegedly said, “No, I had a group of midgets with me who ran away when you got here. Yeah, I was (expletive) alone, dude. Do you see anyone else?”"

Even super sloshed, I think I would have the mental restraint not to say something like that to a cop. And if I were the cop, I definitely could not keep a straight face through that exchange. In all fairness, I'm sure most people, drunk or not, feel like "sassing" cops when they ask you, "Do you know why I pulled you over miss?" Blah blah, I get it, just write the ticket.